Saturday, February 7, 2009

What If....

What if our toenails are really aliens? Maybe they are making little colonies under our beds. But its not the big ones we need to worry about, no sir. Them big ones are easy to get with a broom, vacume or one of those nifty dust mop things. No its the small ones that worry me. The broom skips over them too easily, and they stick in the rug so the vacume can't get them. And they laugh at dust mops let me tell you. Nope its definitly the small ones that I worry about. They have the time to plan. What terrible toenailish plans might they be hatching right now, under your bed? Hah, you'll say you have a maid. Maybe her name is Hazel or Alice or something retro like that. Maybe she actually gets down on hands and knees to maid around under the bed. Maybe she even moves the bed to clean under it. But it still won't help. You see I fear that tiny toenail clippings who are actually aliens know about base boards, and even the best stereotypical maid won't bother to clean under the base boards, not without a really good tip anyway. No, I fear that if our toenails are really aliens, and they have had time to lay thier plans against us, then we are doomed.

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